It is hard to be a mom. In winter. In Wisconsin*.

*And Chicago, Indiana, Minnesota, Pittsburgh, Boston, Rhode Island, Denver and all the other frigid, snowy places where you, my friends, call home.

I love living in Wisconsin. I love being a mom. But being a mom in Wisconsin in the middle of February is trying. For example, in the last 24 hours I:

• Washed my son’s winter coat, which was covered in mud and a few other unidentifiable substances, because, in his words, “I fell on the ice more than once today.”
• Force-fed my kids Vitamin D gummy chews to prevent Vitamin D deficiency and cheery things like rickets and bone demineralization.
• Vacuumed the back door rug three times because it was starting to glitter from all the salt tracked in from our driveway. (Glittering diamonds = good. Glittering road salt = bad.)
• Tried in vain to help my daughter locate her missing glove. (Our fifth of the season. And that doesn’t include the hats, socks and scarves that are also M.I.A.)

I didn’t realize there was something inherently wack about being a mom in winter in Wisconsin until my younger sister Emily pointed out that not every mother in the United States has it this tough.

After watching me carry out my aforementioned winter-related tasks, Emily said, “The weather in Wisconsin really creates barriers and headaches for moms here, doesn't it?”

“Um, YES,” I answered.

“’KIDS, PUT ON YOUR HATS, MITTENS, JACKETS, SNOW PANTS, SOCKS, BOOTS AND SCARVES,’” Emily said, imitating me. “What a nightmare that is for your daily routine!”

“YES,” I answered again.

Emily, who had just moved back to Wisconsin after living in San Diego for many years, appeared deep in thought. “You Midwestern moms have thick skin! Southern California moms don’t have to deal with any of this. It’s as easy as, ‘Kids, get your sandals on and grab your beach bag!’”

“’Get your sandals on and grab your beach bag,’” I repeated, savoring the sound of those lovely words. Words that will likely never come from my mouth again.

Emily patted my arm. “It’s character-building, sis,” she said, with a great deal of kindness.       

I went to my friend Tonya to see what she thought about all this. Tonya always has encouraging and inspiring things to say about motherhood, so I figured she’d have something encouraging and inspiring to say about being a mom in winter in Wisconsin. I was incorrect.

Tonya, who had just gotten home from a vacation in Costa Rica, replied, “I’m the wrong person to ask. I thought going away somewhere warm would help revitalize me for the rest of winter. But I’m totally depressed since returning two days ago.”  

I don’t have any ideas myself, short of investing in a happy light (www.verilux.com), which helps my kids wake up in the morning, and stocking up on warm wool sweaters from Banana Republic so I at least feel cute while laundering filthy winter gear and keeping rickets at bay.

My good friend Darsee had a few thoughts to share. She tries to get her three boys outside as much as possible – tubing, sledding, ice skating, etc. “But the worst,” she lamented, “is when it’s too cold to play outside or there isn’t any snow. Then I just yell a lot and drink.”

I know Darsee isn't alone in this.

However we manage to survive winter – which, around here, can last until April if it's a particularly bad year – I think that we should take some serious credit for being hearty and thick-skinned. Sort of like pioneer women. Pioneer women with very strong characters.

Take heart, Tonya and Darsee and everyone out there who’s sun-deprived and sick of hibernating: only a few more months and we can call it spring.